Rules Who Needs Them?

 

What’s the answer to that question?   I know someone who carries an imaginary backpack.  It’s filled with phantom books the size of the phone books you get in any major city.  Each of those books is filled with rules for every situation in the universe.  What a heavy load for this person to carry!

 

 

It amazes me that this person invents a rule for every situation he comes upon.  Now perhaps it’s because he’s Virgo Moon.  Perhaps it’s because he has a retrograde Mercury.  Whatever the reason, before he takes any action or says anything, he mentally goes flipping through all these imaginary books to find out what the rule is in this particular situation.  So if you meet him and he is hesitating to answer you, or is slow to respond, understand that he mentally is flipping through all these rule books frantically looking for the answer on how to proceed in this situation you are discussing

 

 

Why this amazes me is that I have invented my own rules for living since I was 2 years of age.  I never look to anyone else’s rule, but determine what single rule I choose to live by.  I have to look myself in the mirror every day.  So I have to live with my own conscience.  

 

So my rule always is,

“Will I be able to live with the outcome of this situation

tomorrow or

a week from now or

a year from now, or

for the rest of my life?

 

 

From my second year of teaching until I retired I gave this poem to every group of teens I worked with.  Teenagers as they feel their way through life are opposed to rules and restrictions of any kind.  These words led to some great discussions about why SOME rules are necessary.  It may help some of you out with the people in your household.

 

Rules by Rod McKuen in Watch for the Wind

 

I wish the rules for everything

Were printed in the daily paper,

Spelled out on billboards 10 feet high

Or taught to us in school.

Reading, writing and arithmetic and RULES

Not needed to pass the course

But to get us through

Our allotted time here.

 

Reflection Questions! 

  1.  What rule book do you follow?
  2. What is your main rule in life?
  3. What rules are not necessary?
  4. Why do we have rules of any kind?

 

Affirmations and Intentions:  I intend to follow my own rules in life, harming no person and seeking harmony.

 

 

Let’s increase the Love and vibrant energy of the planet!

Hugs and love from the Universe.

 

 

  If you are on a spiritual journey, you might also want to explore my website at www.moonwomenspirituality.com. 

For more information on dealing with the energy around life, love and relationships, visit my blog at  www.astromoon.wordpress.com.

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

What Tribe do you Belong to?

 A 30 year old man died last night by his own hand.  It doesn’t matter how he chose to commit suicide.    He lived only for his drugs and partying.  Did he discover that his friends made through drugs and alcohol were shallow friendships?  We will never know.  He had no sense of purpose for the last decade of his life.  He had no true sense of belonging. 

 

Self actualize!

Self actualize!

A sense of belonging is a human fundamental emotional need.  We all have a need to feel needed by someone else, even if it is one single person.  That person validates us and makes us feel special.  We can then go forward with living a life on purpose. 

 

 

 

I am sad that this young man choose this route.  I have worked extensively with teens who did not complete suicide.  In all cases but one we were able to give them a sense of belonging to the tribe or to greater community.  But you see it ultimately is not up to any one of us to establish that sense of belonging for others.  They have to choose to belong to the tribe themselves.  They have to feel needed.

 

I am sad for this young man’s family whom I personally know.  They will live the rest of their lives questioning where they went wrong.  They didn’t do anything wrong.  It was his choice.  At any moment he could have chosen a different path, but he never took the multitude of opportunities that came his way. 

 

Love life!

Love life!

Frankly, I get angry at people who complete suicide.  They truly are the ultimate in being selfish.  They are not up to the challenge of grabbing onto the roller coaster ride of life.  They leave behind a legacy of guilt and tears in the people they supposedly love.  I have heard far too often from friends and family of suiciders.  Years later, the ones left behind feel guilty at not having done something. 

 

 

 

Hear this message loud and clear.  There is nothing you could have done.  It is a personal choice to opt out of life.  They have chosen to be the walking dead to begin with.  They have not truly been alive for some time.  That totally is their choice. Their choice is a permanent fix to a temporary problem.  The person who opts out of life by suicide usually does not want help.  The help is everywhere today.  They are too selfish to get it.  They fear more than they love life or love themselves. 

 

 

Reflection Questions! 

  1.  What tribes to do you belong to?
  2. What purpose do you have for living your life?
  3. How do you give to your community?
  4. What are at least four things you want to accomplish yet?

 

Affirmations and Intentions:  I intend to be grateful for living a life on purpose.

4 Ways to Face Your Fear Drag-ons

Fear is a drag-on our emotions.  Fear holds us back from achieving our true potential in life.  There are really only two emotions in this world:  fear and love.  They are at opposite poles and all other emotions fall between the fear or negative emotion and love, the positive emotion.

 

 

Sleeping Drag-on

Sleeping Drag-on

 

 

Who knows what will trigger our fear?  Sometimes these fears are huge drag-ons.  Little tiny things will trigger them to come our way.  Frequently we give our startled response and act in anger.  Is it really anger you are feeling or do you fear something that has become your drag-on?  Is it really pain you are feeling or has your sleeping drag-on awakened?

 

 

 

 

 You see, people who truly love us, support us emotionally. What happens in our lives truly matters to them. They want our happiness and our joy. They are part of our Love Journey. When we leave them we feel positive, upbeat and good about ourselves.  They help give us a sense of belonging.  They help us to look in the mirror of life and reaffirm that we are just fine the way we are.  That’s what love does.

 

 

Friends as Drag-ons

Friends as Drag-ons

Other times they appear as friendly drag-ons.  Those are people we thought were friends, only they bring out these negative feelings in us.  They leave us feeling drained, uninspired and negative.  I call them our soul-sucking drag-ons.  They certainly don’t love us. 

They are doing everything they can to steal our personal power by showering us with their negative energy.

 

 

 

4 Ways to Slay Your Drag-ons

 

Slay your drag-ons  So I’m suggesting you start slaying your Fear drag-ons. Start with the one that haunts you the most.  That drag-on is impacting your life the most, so let’s get rid of it first.   First drag it up to your conscious level.  Second ask yourself what is the worst possible thing that can happen if you deal with it head on?  Third, rehearse in your mind how you want the scene the go the next time you have to face that particular drag-on.  Fourth, how do you want to feel once you are finished slaying your worst drag-on?  I hope you will say, “I Love myself for facing my fear”.  It’s the only way you will ever find Your Sacred Safe Place in your heart and your soul.

 

 

 

Cross Rainbow Bridge

 

Cross that bridge to loving yourself.  You see, if you love yourself enough, you will choose to slay your drag-ons.  Your drag-on feelings are holding you back from reaching your true potential in life.  You did not come here to fear life.  You came here to love yourself enough to embrace life.  When you face your drag-ons by crossing that bridge, you will have abundant love and beauty surrounding you wherever you go.  So what is holding you back from loving the most important person on the planet … YOU!

 

 

Reflection Questions! 

  1. What is your main fear?
  2. What is the virgin moment of when that fear started?
  3. What is the worst possible thing to happen to you if you confront that fear?
  4. How will you feel if that fear no longer rules your personal world?

 

Affirmations and Intentions:  I intend to face my fears.  I am the drag-on slayer.  I intend to walk my world in love.  I love me!

 

 

Man has a pretty static picture of the world,

Accidentally or forcibly imprinted upon him

By means of chains of conditioned associations.

Man believes him imprint board is reality.

(Timothy Leary)

 

Let’s increase the Love and vibrant energy of the planet!

Hugs and love from the Universe.

 

 

 

  If you are on a spiritual journey, you might also want to explore my website at www.moonwomenspirituality.com.  For more information on dealing with the energy around life, love and relationships, visit my blog at  www.astromoon.wordpress.com.

 

Bullies are Sociopaths & Psychopaths

Bullies in the Hood?  Bullies in your office?  Bullies in your family? Take back your Sacred Space.  Take back your Neighborhood! Use your mind-body-spirit connection to rid your world of these toxic bugs.  They are like pesky mosquitoes everywhere.  Visualize them as being a pesky mosquito and “slap” them mentally, emotionally and spiritually.    

 

 

I have worked with some pretty mean bullies in my lifetime.  The psychological literature shows that bullies are frequently our bosses.  They are found in every family.  They are found in every political party.  They are found in every neighborhood.  They are found in every club and organization.

 

 

Let me explain what their behavior means in psychological terms.  According to the DSMIV, they are officially one of two names either sociopaths or psychopaths.  They exhibit psychopathological behavior.  Yes, I know, you thought those were the people in jail who committed some unspeakable crime.  They too are sociopaths who have committed a crime they got caught for.  There are also sociopaths who frequently are white color workers or like I said, they live and breathe everywhere.  They clearly exhibit the same types of emotional and behavioral patterns that have put the others behind bars.  Like prisoners, they are prisoners within their own skin because of their choices. Some we call psychic vampires or soul vampires.  We totally feel drained when we are in their presence.  I have written about that earlier in this blog.

 

 

 

Nobody has every liked them since they were kids.  They are totally insecure.  Let me explain.  All of us want attention when we are children.  If we can’t get it in a positive way, then we become poorly behaved and get that attention in a negative way.  Take a look at any adorable 2 year old.  If they don’t get loving attention, they start screaming just so that someone will pay attention to them and their emotions.  So a bully is self-created by their own choice of how to act!

 

 

When it goes on for a long time, they learn the only way they can get attention from their peers is through bullying and intimidation.  They use manipulation to get others to bend to their will.  They use this energy of fear tactics because it is the only way they have any personal power.  The other way they get power is to get into a position of authority.  Then what absolute horrors they bring to all our lives. 

 

 

So what can we do about it?  One strategy I have already told you about.  Visualize and don’t run away.  Face them head on.  You see bullies do not like to be confronted.  They don’t know what to do if someone isn’t screaming or shouting back.  If you remain calm, cool and collected, they are totally unsure of themselves.  They feed off fear energy. 

 

 

Conversely, another more powerful strategy  is you can be an angel, but a firm angel.  First do the visualization so that you are changing the energy around you.  You’ll be giggling inside at least.  Then surround yourself with a golden colored cocoon so their negative energy won’t hurt you.  Next send them loving energy.  Wrap them tightly in warm soothing hugs and send them love energy.  That’s truly what they crave.  But you see, they do not love themselves.  If a person does not love themselves, they are incapable of ever loving anyone else.  We have to surround them in a multisensory way with love energy.  If you are an angel of light, you will do what you can to help this impoverished soul.  They are in such emotional pain. 

 

 

Personally, I feel sorry for the choices they have made for themselves during their life’s journey.  At any moment in time, these bullies can choose to change their own energy.  They too can choose to begin loving themselves.  This in turn will help them to loving others in a healthy way.  Be an angel.  Help them to change their energy if you are a healer and they want to change their energy.  These bullies are truly in their own personal self-created hell. 

 

Affirmations and Intentions:  I intend to teach others to change their attitudes when they are ready to love themselves.

 

 

Let’s increase the Love and vibrant energy of the planet!

Hugs and love from the Universe.

 

 

For more information on dealing with the energy around life, love and relationships, visit my blog at  www.astromoon.wordpress.com.  If you are on a spiritual journey, you might also want to explore my website at www.moonwomenspirituality.com. 

 [M. Scott Peck, psychiatrist wrote his book, People of the Lie, explaining this in more depth.]

Love Relationship Suitcase

What are you packing in your life suitcase?  Who are you choosing to pack around with you?  Empower yourself!  You get to choose what those suitcases contain.  What colors of clothes do you want?  What size do you want? Have you recently changed your preferred colors or sizes?  Do you want to change the shoes you are taking?

 

 

Similarly, the people we have in our inner circle are those we pack with us in life.  Periodically we should check to see who we are packing in our suitcases of Life.  If your energy size has changed, then perhaps you can choose to only take along people who are more positive.  Perhaps you can choose to take along people who help you on the Life Path you are on right now.  Take a look at your past.  Are you still packing people from your past?  Perhaps it’s time to get a smaller suitcase and not pack them around anymore!

 

 

You see we are getting ready for a much needed vacation.  Last night a friend called and demanded to know why I have not called her recently in her hour of needing to hear about her latest lament.  Frankly, she has all the skills to deal with her issues.  Rather than use the skills and do the work for herself, she wants someone else to carry her and do her work for her.  Like many people who seem to prefer to live from negative crisis to crisis, she tries to be very demanding of my time.  So I decided not to pack her in my suitcase anymore.  I turned her problems back over to her to solve a couple of years ago.  It’s time for her to carry her own stuff. So now I call once a month to check in, instead of several times a week.

 

 

Is it easy to change the energy when we love different people in our lives?  NO!  It’s something I certainly struggle with.  Tough Love is never fun.  I need to be needed. But in this particular case, I love her enough to want her to empower herself and trust in her own decision making.  I love her enough to want her to pay attention to her own intuition and interpret her own dreams.  She needs to pay attention to her own coincidences, patterns and cycles of life.  All those signposts help to empower her in the direction on her Map of Life.  It’s time for her to be the lovely soul she came to this earth to be.  She needs to choose to live her life on her purpose and her intentions.  I love her enough to have her do the work on herself and to carry her own Life’s suitcase.  I love her enough for her to begin reading her own Map.

 

 

When your own energy has changed and you are choosing a more positive growth path for yourself, often you will find the old luggage still wants to hang around.  However, they no longer fit in your suitcase.  You’ve changed your colors into vibrant growth colors.  You are a different more pleasing energy size.  Very gently remove the old clothing from your luggage and give them to God and the universe to take care of.  If you are on a significant growth path, they will only weight you down.  Honey, even your Sherpa guide couldn’t possibly carry them all. 

Reflection Questions

1.  Where are you choosing to focus your passion and energy? 

2.  What is in your baggage or luggage?  Can you downsize?

3. Are you packing others, or packing yourself and your soul’s growth?

4.  Which 4 people are you going to put in your suitcase to accompany you on your Journey?

 

 

Affirmation:  I intend to pack my suitcase with people who are growth oriented.  I choose to spend my time on positive people who are actively moving forward.

Empower yourself!

Use the Law of Attraction, your vision board and

attract positive people into your life.

Now isn’t that a wonderful notion in motion

for your Life Map and Your Life suitcase?

 

 I love my journey into myself.  Do you love your journey?  If not, then do the work to empower yourself!  If you found this helpful, then visit my website www.moonwomenspirituality.comIf you desire information on how the energy of the Sun and Moon affect your life, career and love, visit my blog at www.astromoon.wordpress.com  

Bullies and Alternative Healing

The biggest tournament of the year was about to happen and I called her into my office and told her she was not allowed to go.  She was devastated and of course went to her parents lamenting the fact that this was to be her last basketball game in that K-9 school and she was not allowed to attend.  Her mother was one of my favorite staff members.  Her father walked me “down the aisle” when we got married 5 years ago.  So I’m very close to the family.  This girl is like looking myself in the mirror at the same age since she is also a Taurus and born 2 days after me.  

New Beginnings

New Beginnings

The egg is a seed.  To me a seed stands for new beginnings of some kind.  In my last year of teaching and being school administrator, bullying was a real issue. The 14 year old star of our girls’ basketball team was being a bully.  Her coach complained about her behavior at practice.  Her teammates tearfully came to me for counseling when her comments ripped them to shreds emotionally. 

 

 

 

 

 

However, she had become a bully not only to her teammates and to her coach, but also to other kids in the school.  Understand this is a gal who is beautiful, smart and a leader.  But she had become full of herself and was arrogant.  I knew that somehow I had to nip this behavior in the bud or she would be horrid as an adult. 

 

Needless to say, her father called me at home that night saying his daughter was just sobbing her heart out and Daddy wanted to fix it for his eldest child.  I listened and told him I would deal with her in the morning, but made no promises.  On my 45 minute drive to school I prayed to God to give me a solution since it was beyond me.  Instantly the answer came to have the girl go and buy a dozen eggs before I did a counseling session with her on this issue. 

 

When she brought me the eggs, I had her write the names of each of her team mates on the each egg.  Then I had her write her coach’s’ and the names of her two sisters.  So now each egg had a name on it.  She picked up each egg in turn and told that person how she truly felt about them and what she cherished about them.

I then had her take each egg, one at a time and put it on the floor and stomp on it.  When she was through with all 12 eggs, I told her she had to pick up each individual egg and yolk and return it just the way she found it.  Of course this is impossible. 

 

 

I then told her that is what she does with each person she belittles and puts down.  She breaks their spirit with her words.  They are never returned whole in the same state at which she found them.  It mixes them up and they are shattered.  I asked her how she felt towards each of these people whom I know she loves.  When she told me she was devastated by her behavior, I then had her clean up her yellow yolky mess.  She then had to go and find each person whose name was on an egg and apologize to them for her behavior. She was to tell them how much she valued their friendship and how much she loved them.  Here was the condition.  If they accepted her apology with grace and forgiveness, she got to go to the tournament.  She was not to tell her friends that.  She was crying, I was crying for the soul of this young chick. 

 

It was a lesson well learned.  Yes, she got to go to the tournament.  When she went to high school, she became a phenomenal leader, with compassion and understanding.  Today, I’ve very proud of the young adult woman she has turned out to be.  She is a leader in her small community.  She is a valuable contributing member to her peers.  She even likes herself now and no longer feels the need to bully. 

 

 

You see, bullies are the most insecure people in the world.  When we confront them, it takes away their power.  If there is a bully in your life today, take the seed of this idea.  Create a new beginning for yourself and for your life.  Confront your fear and do not let them run over you.  Be an angel for your sake and theirs and confront them with their behavior.

 

Sometimes we have to use the seeds of tough love to have the result of a lovely caring and compassionate person.  Did I know how this was going to turn out?  Not at all.  But God gave me a clear message and I trusted that message.

 

Take the first step in faith.

You don’t have to see the whole staircase,

just take the first step.

(Martin Luther King Jr.)

 

 

I love my journey into myself.  Do you love your journey?  If not, then do the work to empower yourself!  If you found this helpful, then visit my website www.moonwomenspirituality.com.  If your want information on how the daily Moon and Sun energy emotionally affects you, your love and your relationships, visit my astrology blog at www.astromoon.wordpress.com

Love Wins Over Fear

 

You want to be happy.  You want more love in your life.  Yah but … I’m Fearful of life.  Self sabotage?  Fear of Success?  Fear of a healthy relationship? Fear of moving forward with your life?  You can have more joy and happiness in your life through the energy of Love.  Empower yourself through raising your consciousness!  That’s as easy as it gets.  Color your world with Love energy!

 

 

 

I frequently hear from people who simply are afraid.  They tell me the current difficulty in their lives in a counseling session.  At the root problem they fear something.  Fear is a scary enemy that will rule your emotional world unless you are willing to put on the clothes of the fearless warrior. 

Little love wins over big fear

Little love wins over big fear

 

Talk to any soldier.  They are scared when they go to war.  Fear rules their world.  But they do something the rest of us can learn from.  They choose to look beyond themselves at the bigger picture.  If they did not fight the good fight for the sake of the nation, they fear being overrun.  In other words, they love their country enough to risk losing a battle.  You can do the same thing for your own life.  You are letting fear overrun and over come you.  It rules in your world unless you become a fearless warrior fighting for a quality of your life. 

 

 

 

 

Here’s what I know to be true.  There are two emotions that rule us in this life.  Any other emotions travel between these two. 

 

Fear  = 0__________5 = Average__________Love = 10

 

Literally every other feeling we experience can be placed somewhere along this scale or continuum.  You see emotions are energy.  To overcome a negative emotion, you have to move towards it’s polar opposite.  You must neutralize the negative energy effect. 

 

 Think about it!  When you add some white milk to chocolate milk, the chocolate color becomes less dark.  Keep on adding more white milk and it dilutes it further.  Similarly, you keep on adding Love emotions and energy or white light emotions to any dark emotion you have and you dilute the negative effect. 

 

Love is the Winner!

Love is the Winner!

So how do you go about doing that? 

One step at a time. 

One day at a time.

One confidence builder at a time.   

 

Yah, you might be scared to take that baby step.  Do it anyway.  Cross that bridge of fear you have built.  Choose love which is a higher vibration and move towards the light of loving yourself.  Choose loving something you are passionate about and focus on that to overcome your fear.  One baby step at a time.  You can do it!  Do the self talk and change that inner tape you have playing in your head.  Write a love note to yourself patting you on the back for each baby step you take.  Growing and moving forward!  Take back your potential.  Take back your life.  Strive for Moments of Loving Joy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reflection Questions

1.  Who do I fear?                                                 

2.  What do I fear?

3.  What’s the worst thing that can happen if I take a step forward?

4.  What do I love that can be my motivation sword?

 

Affirmation:

I intend to face my fear.

I choose being fearless.

I love myself.

I love my life!

 

 

Finish each day and be done with it.

You have done what you could.

Some blunders and absurdities have crept in;

forget them as soon as you can.

Tomorrow is a new day.

You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit

to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

 

I love my journey into myself.  Do you love your journey?  If not, then do the work to empower yourself!  If you found this helpful, then visit my website www.moonwomenspirituality.com.  If your want information on how the daily Moon and Sun energy emotionally affects you, your love and your relationships, visit my astrology blog at www.astromoon.wordpress.com